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May 12th, 2008

Art Imitates Life: I Remember Mama

There was this fantastic movie called I Remember Mama (1948) that is one of my favorites. When we were over at my Grandmother’s house for Mother’s Day, we ended up watching it (AMC tends to play it every Mother’s Day).

It’s about a young girl (Katrin) from an immigrant Norwegian family that wants to be a writer. After a bunch of rejections, she decides she wants to give up. As she’s telling her family she wants to give up her father notices there is a newspaper article from a very famous celebrity writer Mrs. Moorehead. Mrs. Moorehead’s advice, “Be sincere.” The young Katrin sighs and says something like, “Lot of help that is.” But her mother asks him to keep reading the article.

It mentions that Mrs. Moorehead has a love of cooking. Mama gets the thinking look and the scene fades out from Katrin’s bedroom to a hotel lobby.

Mama looks around and finds Mrs. Moorehead in the lobby. She introduces herself and tries to foist this huge pile of wrapped papers at her. Mrs. Moorehead says, “Oh, I never read unpublished authors.” Banter ensues until Mama says, “I have a goulash recipe from my great-grandmother in the old country, the secret ingredients would be different from anything you’ve ever had. Why don’t you look at the stories while I write down the recipe.” Mrs. Moorehead hesitates, then sighs, sits down, and reaches out for the stories.

Best. Networking. Ever.

Not only does Mama not feel intimidated even though it is made clear Mrs. Moorehead is a famous lady, a celebrity, Mama knows she has something that this woman will want. She knows that she can be heard. So she doesn’t worry about how famous she is, she figures it can’t hurt to try.

Mama comes home and tells Katrin she had two glasses of sherry and talked with the famous writer for two hours. They swapped recipes and got to know each other and Katrin’s stories were read and critiqued. (If you want to know what happens from that point forward, I’d recommend renting the movie, it’s really a good movie.)

While this example is from a movie, it happens every day and you can use this when you network as well. If someone has something you want, what do you have that you can provide in exchange? The answer could be as simple as a nice conversation, or it could be giving them your mother’s favorite recipe.

But you’ll never know if you don’t try!

Image Source: dvdtown.com

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By Jennifer Gniadecki -- 0 comments

May 12th, 2008

Taking Chances: Take Some Candy From Strangers

Mother always said, “Don’t take candy from strangers.”

Personally, I was never offered candy from strangers as a child, but as an adult I find that there are strangers out there willing to give you candy all the time. From actual candy to discounts to freebies, there’s a lot of candy out there for the perceptive networker.

• Girls’ Night Out events have samples galore.
• Business cards let you know what people do, that’s sweet!
• Home Parties (great for networking depending on the circumstances) always entail free food.

I know for many even going to a networking event is taking a chance. But that’s not enough, if you go to a networking event happening at a spa, you can get a free pedicure or eyebrow wax. That has to make you feel better about going. If it doesn’t, go and don’t get any services done, then you can feel good being the only person there not in flip flops or rocking the forehead red marks that come with getting waxed. Yeowch!

If all of that still feels overwhelming, try going to one event this month. There are so many to choose from (in most areas) and if you really can’t handle meeting people in person, there are events online all the time, like the online Business and Learning networking chat on Tuesday evenings at 8pm. Everyone gets together and you can communicate via text or microphone. There is no lower-pressure networking event out there. You don’t even have to brush your hair, for goodness sake!

So take a chance, take some candy from strangers. It could improve your professional as well as personal life in one night!

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By Jennifer Gniadecki -- 1 comment

May 10th, 2008

Pick a Card - Any Card (When Businesses are Different)

So you’ve found yourself at a crossroads where you have two (or more) businesses that are completely unrelated. Say…a petsitting business and a freelance writing business. (I don’t know anyone that has these two businesses, but it seems like it could be a really good fit, no?)

Should you have a business card for each, or should you put them on different cards and then hope you’re giving the right card to the right person?

There are two schools of thought on this. First I’ll share the one I don’t agree with.

You should only have one business per card or people will get confused. I see the validity of this because people are easily confused and you get more business when you can be clear and concise in your message when people ask what you do. The problem is the more businesses you have, the more cards you have, and you’ll look a little confused shuffling through your own cards to find the right one to give out. Furthermore, if you give someone three business cards, they might be a little overwhelmed.

Put all your businesses on one card. This is my preference, but it has to be done right or it looks even more confused than shuffling through cards or handing out multiple cards. Here are a few ways you can make your multiple businesses look good on one card.

• A business card has two sides. You could advertise one business on the front and one on the back.
• If you have more than two businesses, you could use blocks of color to separate the sections and highlight one business per section. If you have three, you could focus your main business on front and put the two secondary businesses on the back of the card.
• Put contact information on the front and a description of services and businesses on the back of the card.

Before you put more than one business on a business card, prioritize your businesses. Which one do you like the most? Which one makes the most profit per client? Which one is the most fun? The business that is the best, most profitable, or most fun should get more space on your card.

You could even combine the petsitting business and writing business with a cute logo on the business card that was a man or woman walking a manuscript instead of a piece of paper. Or use a catchy phrase like, we’ll walk your dog or your writing assignment on time every time. Help people remember you do more than one thing.

If you make it easy for your potential customer, they’ll be more likely to remember you and recommend you to others.

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By Jennifer Gniadecki -- 0 comments

May 9th, 2008

Pick a Card - Any Card (When Businesses are Similar)

As a solopreneur (micro-business owner, freelancer, etc.) you may do more than one thing. Even if you are a small business owner you may own more than one small business.

So…what do you do about your business cards?

If all of your businesses or freelance specialties are in the same family, you can put them on the same business card.

Example: I’m a freelance writer, blogger, and author. It’s not completely remiss to put them all one one card. In fact, I make sure I put freelance writer first, blogger second, and at the bottom I just mention that I’m the author of Non-Toxic Networking. The last line gives credence/authority to the first two. Oh, she’s a freelance writer that wrote a book. They make (correct in my case) assumptions about my work ethic and finishing projects, because a book is a big undertaking.

Example: I have an acquaintance that has both a Chocolate Tour business as well as being a very successful Mary Kay representative. She also wrote a book on relationships. While these may seem unrelated on the surface, she has a lot of house parties and spa parties where she makes all three of her businesses come together in a woman-centric way. Of course chocolate and makeup and relationships go together. Valerie has a way of bringing it all together so it feels seamless. If you’re in the mood for chocolate you’re probably in the mood for new makeup and you’re probably in the mood to read about relationships. Valerie’s businesses all focus on the same mood.

The only other thing you need to worry about is business card design. Here are a few tips:

• Don’t overcrowd your card.
• Don’t put too many web addresses on your card.
• Only use one email address and phone number on your card.
• Try to find a theme that you can put into a one line call to action on the bottom of your card. Nothing sleazy or sales-y, but something that lets your potential customer know when to call you.

Tune in later today for Part 2: When Business are Different - here’s a hint - you may need more than one business card.

Image Source: Newscom

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By Jennifer Gniadecki -- 0 comments

May 8th, 2008

Even Lawyers Find That Networking is Most Effective

A survey developed by Robert Half Legal, and conducted by an independent research firm includes responses from 300 attorneys among the largest law firms and corporations in the United States and Canada. All respondents have at least three years of experience in the legal field.

Lawyers were asked, “Which of the following do you feel is the most effective way to find a job in the legal field? ” Their responses:

• Networking/friend or peer referral 48%
• Staffing or placement firm 16%
• Internship/clerkship 13%
• Law school recruiting program 8%
• Contacting law firms or companies that interest you 8%
• Internet/job board posting 5%
• Classified advertisements 1%
• Other 1%

“In the tight-knit legal community, knowing the right person is often the most effective way to discover the best opportunities,” said Charles Volkert, executive director of Robert Half Legal. “Attorneys can use professional networking sites, in addition to traditional networking activities, to meet new people and uncover job leads.”

About Robert Half Legal
Robert Half Legal is the legal staffing division of Robert Half International. The company provides law firms and corporate legal departments with highly skilled professionals, including attorneys, paralegals and legal support personnel, on a project and full-time basis. Robert Half Legal offers online job search services at www.roberthalflegal.com.

Source: Robert Half Legal
Image Source: clix via sxc.hu

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By Jennifer Gniadecki -- 0 comments

May 8th, 2008

What Does Potty Training Have to do With Good Networking?

I was thinking about my potty training woes (mostly I can’t find the underwear we currently have in the house so can’t do it right now) and my phone rang. I answered, of course, and it was a business contact that was calling to check in and catch up.

She has kids. I know she has kids. So I ask, “How old were your kids, really, when they were potty trained?” There was a pause and she said, “The public story is they were potty trained at 2 years old.” I was shocked, because you’d have to be stupid not to pick up on the part where she says “public story.” I said, “My kids are 2 and 3 and have no interest…is it me?”

Her response was, “No, my kids were actually 4 and a week before kindergarten started. You just don’t tell that to other people because everyone says it should be done by 2. Everyone is basically lying.”

Part of me thinks this is phenomenal, because now I know I’m not a freak and it’s not a big deal my girls want nothing to do with the bathroom (other than the bath) and I don’t have to force them to potty-train next week in order for them to be normal.

The more important part of the story is that I just bonded with my business contact in a real, solid way. She told me a secret. Not a life changing, get therapy secret, but one that she felt comfortable sharing with me.

What does this say about our relationship from a networking standpoint?

• She felt comfortable enough to share a secret with me.
• She cared about my feelings and gave me comfort for my situation.
• She trusts me with her secret.

Whenever you’re looking to have a relationship with someone that may give you work, or refer work your way the essential things you need from that relationship are to be memorable, trustworthy, and make the referrer want to give you business.

I nailed all three with one phone call. You can too. The topic doesn’t need to be toddlers or potty training. The secret shouldn’t be something that is life altering or very traumatic. What can you share about yourself that will make others feel they really care about you?

Image Source: trohaa via sxc.hu

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By Jennifer Gniadecki -- 0 comments

May 7th, 2008

Fake It ‘Till You Make It?

You know who I’m talking about.

• The guy who flashes his gold watch at every opportunity.
• The woman who manages to mention her Prada bag once per conversation.
• The loud one that keeps talking about how successful his company is.
• The uppity looking lady that seems to be looking down on everyone.

You’re at a networking event for a reason. Everyone knows you are there to sell something - service or product - to the masses at the event. Pretending you don’t need the peons at a networking event makes you look downright silly, because if you didn’t need to be there…you wouldn’t be.

Very few people attend networking events for fun, as such, acting like you don’t need to be there or shouldn’t be there or are too good to be there just makes you look fake.

I know there are a lot of reputable authors that say you need to act successful to become successful. What they mean is having a confidence that is deep and strong. A confidence that isn’t seen by the people you’re talking to, but felt by them. It’s unconscious, and certainly doesn’t have anything to do with a gold watch or Prada bag.

The flashier you try to be, the less people will want to talk to you.

How do you act different when you’re in a crowd of people? Do you clam up and become a wallflower, or do you become overbearing and clumsy or something in between or entirely different?

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By Jennifer Gniadecki -- 0 comments

May 7th, 2008

Stop Talking Already!

Have you ever been to an event and someone cornered you and talked to you until you wondered if you could gnaw your own leg off to escape?

How do you know if you are that person?

• People don’t look you directly in the eye. They’ll let their gaze wander on anything but you.
• The person you’re talking to will check for a watch (real or imagined) more frequently.
• Your victim will be scanning the crowd like they’re searching for something.

If you notice any of these signs, do not ask them if there’s a problem. Find a way to wrap up whatever it is you’re talking about and ask a question. It gives them an out so they can ditch you if you’ve been overbearing, and at the very least lets them do some of the talking.

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By Jennifer Gniadecki -- 1 comment

May 6th, 2008

Is Your Business Attractive? Or is it Just You?

I know many small business owners that absolutely dwell on the branding question.

• What is my company brand?
• Does my logo match the message?
• What is my unique selling proposition (USP)?
• What benefits am I providing to my customers/clients?

These are all very important questions (and you can get more information about branding at the BrandCurve blog) but no matter how clear you are on your branding, if you’re not attractive to the people you’re networking with, it’s all for naught.

Think about it this way. If you had a choice between:

• Visiting the ugliest website on the Internet that told you exactly how to be successful at what you’re doing, with step-by-step, totally plausible lists.
• The most beautifully designed website that had crap information.

It seems like a trick question, but really it’s the same when you’re networking. If you have a beautiful business card, but are an obnoxious ass…do you really think you’re going to get more business?

You are what needs to be attractive to your potential client, not your business. You come first, how you present yourself and how you communicate with other people. Your business brand, when you’re networking, is the icing on the cake.

So if you have the choice today between working on your communication skills and your branding, work on the people skills. Call someone and explain your business to them. Ask for feedback. Become more attractive.

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By Jennifer Gniadecki -- 2 comments

May 5th, 2008

Kiss My NLP

I hear so much about NLP (neuro-linguistic programming) in sales and networking and marketing and everywhere else. It’s become so popular in the last few years, even though the concept has been around forever.

There are people that naturally mirror others. I’m one of those people. Stick me in front of someone from Canada and within ten minutes I won’t be rocking out a fake accent, but my speech pattern will shift and I’ll start mirroring the inflection. 100%, but you’ll hear an aboot instead of about, for sure. 

People who are way into NLP will go so far as to pick out words and phrases and mirror them. They’ll mirror hand gestures too, all in the name of being the person that the other person wants to talk to. This is a whole other bag of worms from a little inflection hijacking. You will absolutely have more of a chance of bagging the sale if you do this (without the other person noticing) – but to continue the relationship with every customer you now have to be someone other than you. You have to be a version of your customer.

How on earth can you provide an effective service while thinking the whole time about being like the other person?

I’ve also seen people practice this, and it’s creepy! It sounds like an 8 year old trying to cuss. That weird half-second pause before the cuss word comes out. It doesn’t sound natural. It’s the same thing when people try to sound like the person they’re talking to. If you don’t normally say “Dude!” and your prospect does, you’re going to sound silly saying it. It won’t sound natural. Plus, if you set yourself up and get the client, every time you talk you’re going to have to say the same phrases and keep up the charade or your client will wonder why you seemed so cool to begin with but you’ve changed.

Using NLP at a networking event can get you what you want, but it is a short-term strategy with a high risk for backfiring later. Use at your own risk.

Image Source: gmarcelo

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By Jennifer Gniadecki -- 0 comments